Hiatus

I apologize for the long hiatus between posts. The past 10 days have been...difficult, to say the least.

Over a year ago I injured my back placing an IV on a patient in critical condition. Physical therapy, chiropractors, and spinal injections have filled my off time in the past year in an attempt to relieve the persistent pain. I have good days, I have bad days. Most of the time the pain is manageable and when I decided to venture away from home to travel, I left behind my physician managing my back injury as well. During my last assignment, it was much more manageable. Chiropractor appointments and ibuprofen was enough to keep it in check. So, I expected nothing else when I agreed to another eight weeks away from home. A few weekends ago, that all changed. Spasms started in my low back down into my leg. The pain was something I had never experienced.

I write this to you all not to encourage sympathy or to incite worry in my friends back home. I write this to share with you all how truly blessed I am. I am currently living with a married couple I became friends with during my last assignment here in New Hampshire. They welcomed me into their home with open arms, making me feel like I was part of their family. When the spasming had gotten uncontrollable, they took me to the emergency room, managed my pain medications when I couldn't remember what to take, helped me up and down the stairs to my bedroom, made me food, and attended to any need I had. They didn't ask for this when I came to live with them. This isn't something friends of only a few months should have to deal with. But, they have done it all, without blinking an eye.

Many of you know me well, and understand that I love my independent life. I don't like depending on people. I like being the one to take care of others, not the other way around. I don't think of it as a pride issue, more of a personality trait, if anything. So allowing others to take care of me when I have no other choice is hard enough, but the guilt of depending on people who have already done so much for me can be overwhelming. After discussing this many times with my friend Annie (see my previous post to read about how amazing she is), I let go of some of my guilt, and lamented that everyone has their time of need and has to accept help.

Today, I sit here and wonder, how did I become so blessed to know such amazing people? People who make me want to be more generous, kinder, and more selfless. People who challenge me to be a better person.

I have agreed to take the last few months of the year off of traveling to give my physician in Wisconsin a chance to fix the issues with my back. The plan is to start traveling again after the first of the year, if life cooperates. But, I am at peace with knowing that my limited experience in traveling this year has provided me with gifts I will cherish for a lifetime. And for that, I will be forever grateful.